At Loxdale Primary School, we are committed to creating a safe, calm and inclusive environment where every child feels valued and understood. Our Behaviour and Relationships Policy is rooted in the belief that behaviour is a form of communication and that strong, positive relationships are key to helping children thrive.
By listening closely to the need behind children’s actions, setting clear expectations and using approaches such as PACE (Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity and Empathy), we support pupils in developing self-regulation, resilience and mutual respect. We focus on connection before correction, recognising that some behaviours stem from vulnerabilities rather than choice. Working together with parents and carers, we aim to encourage positive attitudes, celebrate positive behaviour and ensure that all children can learn and grow in a supportive and respectful school community.
While our relational approach focuses on understanding behaviour, this does not mean that negative or unsafe behaviours go without consequences. When necessary, logical consequences are used constructively and immediately following reminders. These may include supervised reflection time using restorative language and methods, removal from out‑of‑hours provision if safety is at risk, or non‑attendance on school visits or representation of school teams where behaviour could compromise safety.
Importantly, our aim is not only to respond to behaviour in the moment, but to support children in becoming respectful, responsible and valued members of their future secondary schools and later, of society. Part of this process involves helping pupils understand that rules and expectations exist everywhere — in school, at home, in the workplace and in wider life — and that learning to follow them is an essential life skill. We are committed to working closely with parents and carers so that together we can guide pupils to become the very best young people and adults they can be. Through consistent boundaries, positive relationships, support, guidance and understanding, we help children develop the character, resilience and self‑regulation they will need throughout their lives.
Restorative Practice
We believe that strong relationships are the foundation of a happy and successful learning environment. That’s why we use restorative practice to help resolve any issues with behaviour or friendships in a positive and respectful way. Instead of focusing on blame or punishment, restorative conversations give children the chance to talk about what happened, understand how their actions affected others and work together to make things right. This relational approach helps children develop empathy, responsibility and problem-solving skills. It also creates a caring school community where everyone feels valued and supported. Alongside this, we follow trauma-informed principles to ensure that every child feels safe and understood, especially if they have faced challenges or adversity. By combining restorative and trauma-informed approaches, we help children build resilience, develop positive mental health and strengthen their overall wellbeing.
Families can support this at home by encouraging open conversations, helping children think about how their actions affect others and promoting kindness and respect in everyday situations. Please feel free to follow the ‘Story telling’ journey poster that we use in school, to open up restorative discussions at home.
We use the Zones of Regulation to help children recognise their emotions, understand how their body feels and learn strategies to manage those feelings in a healthy way. The Zones give children a simple, colour‑coded language to describe their emotions:
No zone is “bad” — all feelings are normal. The aim is to help children notice their emotions early and choose helpful ways to move back towards feeling regulated and ready to learn.
Families often tell us they find the Zones helpful for opening calm conversations. Here are a few simple ways you might use them at home:
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Name the feelings together
Ask questions such as, “Which zone are you in right now?” or “What might help you get back to the Green Zone?” -
Use everyday moments to talk about emotions
For example, “You look a bit tired — maybe you’re in the Blue Zone?” or “That game was really exciting! I wonder if that put you in the Yellow Zone.” -
Model the language yourself
Children learn best when they see adults using the same strategies:
“I’m in the Yellow Zone because I’m rushing. I’m going to take a deep breath.” -
Build a calm‑down toolkit
Try simple strategies like breathing exercises, a quiet space, movement breaks, drawing, or a drink of water. -
Celebrate self‑regulation
Noticing the positives helps enormously:
“Great job recognising you were in the Red Zone and asking for space.”
Using the Zones at home helps children develop emotional awareness, resilience and confidence. Most importantly, it gives them the message that all feelings can be talked about and that they are safe and supported.
CO-JOE
We also use the CO‑JOE Characteristics to help children develop the personal strengths they need to succeed both in school and in life. These characteristics – such as Resilience, Empathy, Teamwork, Leadership, Responsibility and Excellence – give pupils a shared language for understanding what positive character looks like and how it can be shown in everyday situations.
The CO‑JOE approach is woven through our Pathway of Positivity, where we actively recognise and celebrate good choices, positive behaviours and exceptional qualities. Staff praise pupils for demonstrating these characteristics, whether that is showing determination in learning, supporting a friend, tackling a challenge calmly, or being a positive role model. Children may receive verbal praise, rewards, certificates or postcards home when they show these valuable traits.
Using the CO‑JOE Characteristics at Home
Parents and carers may find the CO‑JOE posters useful for reinforcing the same language and recognition at home. You might want to:
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Notice and name when your child shows a CO‑JOE quality, e.g. “That was great teamwork when you helped your sister,” or “You showed real resilience sticking with that homework.”
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Use the posters to start conversations about strengths and goals.
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Encourage your child to reflect on which characteristic they used during their day.
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Celebrate small, everyday moments of kindness, effort and determination.
By using the same character language at home and in school, we work together to help pupils grow into confident, capable and compassionate young people who understand the value of their actions and the strengths they are developing.
Our Commitment to Relationships & Trauma-Informed Practice
We are dedicated to creating a safe, supportive and nurturing environment for every child. Our approach is grounded in leading research on trauma-informed practice and the power of relationships. We draw inspiration from the work of many renowned professionals, including:
*Dr. Karen Treisman – emphasizing empathy, connection and understanding in every interaction.
*Dr. Bruce Perry – highlighting that healing and resilience develop through healthy, trusting relationships.
*Paul Dix – emphasizing that improving behaviour starts with a relational approach, where every adult—whether at home or in school—takes responsibility for leading positive change.
*Michael Rutter - Viewing resilience as a dynamic process allowing individuals to achieve positive outcomes despite challenges.
These principles guide how we create safe, supportive environments where children feel valued, understood and connected. We encourage parents and carers to explore these approaches too, as they play a vital role in building resilience and fostering emotional wellbeing at home.
Together, we can ensure that every child thrives, through empathy, consistency and the power of relationships.